Deidre's Story

Deidre staples

I do not believe that anyone could have a better life than I did. My life with my twin sister and my parents was, in my opinion, perfect. Nothing bad had ever happened to us. We weren’t the family that bad things happen to; those sorts of things just didn’t happen to us. At least that’s what we thought. We thought that we were invincible, my sister and I were good in school and we were both considered “popular” in our school. Unfortunately we didn’t know that this untouchable feeling was soon coming to an end. It was only a few days after Christmas. The lights were still hanging on the roof and the scent of cookies and newly cut Douglas Fir lingered in the house. My parents were going to spend a night with family friends at a fancy restaurant. This was not out of the ordinary my parents would constantly visit their friends, so like always my sister and I stayed at the house with the babysitter waiting in excitement for our parents to get home. hours passed, we ate dinner, and were ready for bed and our parents were still not home. although no one said anything we were all slightly curious as to where my parents had gone. This small thought of curiosity eventually turned into a large one when I was 11:30 and my parents were still not home. the babysitter called them many times but no one answered. She even called the restaurant they ate at but they said that they had already left. Our only option was to call the police. This however did not fix the problem. The officers said that they were not allowed to put out a missing persons report unless our parents were missing for more than 24 hours. My sister had already begun to cry because she had convinced herself that our parents had died. I, on the other hand, was not convinced. I knew that there was hope and that they were still alive. But I was wrong, because that next day the police went looking for them and they found their car on the side of the road. They had lost control of the car by the snow and the car flipped twice killing them instantly. My sister cried herself to sleep for many days and everyone’s number one priority was to make sure that she was okay. I didn’t cry because I didn’t think that they were dead, they couldn’t be. We were the family that only good things happened to and they were gone. I wasn’t convinced and showed no emotion when it came to their death. This made people cling to my sister and leave me in her shadows. They gave her everything she needed to comfort her. She got clothes, toys, everything she wanted. But I got nothing. They looked at me as if I were the cause of their death. As if I were a plague and if they were to get anywhere near me that they would catch what I had. Why did they push me away? Were they afraid of the emotions that I was holding in? or did they really want to only comfort my sister and not me? I don’t know what the reason was but I do know that I wanted what my sister had. I wanted for people to make me feel better. I wanted for people to hug me when I needed it and to whisper words of encouragement to me. At the time the only things that inhibited me from getting that feeling was my sister. I envied what she had, which made me make the worst decision of my life.

Every Sunday our grandmother would take us to her house for Sunday dinner. Just through the woods was a railroad that went over a lake. And so that day, while eating, I cautiously though of my plan. With only hatred rotting my heart I went out with it. We both walked to the railroad and looked over. While she was staring into the crystal clear waters I slowly placed myself behind her and started to forcefully thrust myself toward her. Hearing me behind her she turned wondering what I was doing. Her stepping out of my way made me have nothing to stop myself. And just like I looked up to find my sister standing on the railroad staring as I fell. As I was falling all I could think of was how I became this monster. How did I envy my sister so badly that I would attempt to kill her? I looked up at my sister standing on the railroad and only wished that the jealously, greed, and resentment would have never invaded my body, turning me into nothing but a body containing a disintegrating soul.